Feedback and leadership: Who is feedback about? You or them?
Feedback and leadership: A new coachee sent me his most recent 360 feedback report ahead of our coaching session. He did so reluctantly. And this reluctance represented his approach to our upcoming coaching session. (This was not judgement on my behalf, as he actually told me this himself).
On reading his report, I quickly saw that he had asked 51 people to rate him, of which 43 responded. He subsequently told me that he was very pleased with this response rate – all while I was calculating in my head the man-hours his company technically spent on producing this 360 report! On asking him about the reason he chose to run this 360 (which was his choice to do so), he explained he did it to double-check he was doing okay in his current role, one he had been in for two years. He also saw little in the results to suggest there was anything he needed to work on – though in my mind, opportunities abounded.
Before we get into the main point here, yes, I have to admit I had a moment after I finished my coaching session – when I thought of my coachee’s self-indulgent intention (my judgement). But this scenario is not unusual (re his intent not around numbers of raters) as people do want to know they are doing an okay (or great) job and that they don’t have any major problems to worry about within their role.
But this is not what really captivated my thoughts in this scenario…
For a long while now, I’ve been thinking that feedback is actually more about the giver than the receiver.
“Your feedback to others is always more you than them.”
(Buckingham, M & Goodall, A (2019))
So potentially the lost opportunity my coachee had was thinking about what he could learn about all those that took time to fill out his 360. After all, these are the people he works with, some more closely than others, and others potentially more strategically important.
Why are we giving/receiving feedback? What’s the real reason?
The ability to give feedback to your team is the cornerstone of any leadership role. We get trapped into thinking this is more about the boss giving the subordinate feedback, than it is about their performance and development.
We are taught about feedback in leadership programmes along with various formulae to help us give it – and we are expected to be able to do so after only a brief instructional session. In many ways, it is not that simple. But on the other hand, it perhaps is more simple.
What we do know is that there is something about feedback that isn’t happening.
Something else we know is that in high performing teams, team members provide feedback to each other – safely.
So perhaps the reframe here is that “feedback” is around sharing our different perspectives and having the conversations where it is about both parties. It’s a two-way process. It is about everyone’s growth, and working together – no matter how much diversity exists. A thought, but more later.
Feedback and leadership: What’s the point of feedback?
It’s easy to “judge” someone and pass on our “wisdom”. And we know that feedback comes at us from all angles as it is given to us in abundance…
“We swim in an ocean of feedback. Bosses, colleagues, customers-but also family, friends, and in-laws-they all have “suggestions” for our performance, parenting, or appearance. We know that feedback is essential for healthy relationships and professional development-but we dread it and often dismiss it. That’s because receiving feedback sits at the junction of two conflicting human desires. We do want to learn and grow. And we also want to be accepted just as we are right now.”
(Stone & Heen (2014))
As we all grow in our careers and climb up the ladder, our senses of responsibility to deliver heightens as does – hopefully – our desire to see our people grow. Good intentions abound. But as givers of feedback, we also want to be accepted in our roles. And whether we like it or not, our learning doesn’t stop with higher positions.
Let me slip another fact in here. Givers and receivers of feedback all feel discomfort in varying degrees – especially if it’s about tough or sensitive issues.
So perhaps the point of feedback is around starting or initiating important and relevant conversations where both parties have a role. Perhaps the point of feedback is not actually the feedback itself but the context in which it exists, or the challenge shared together. For example, it could be about the team’s timeliness of deliverables or a boss supporting a reportee’s strategic thinking development, to name a few. There are mutualities in all these and this is where growth and learning together provides the best outcomes.
And the discomfort felt by all is something that we learn to embrace as our working relationships become stronger.
Back to the 360 for feedback and leadership…
At the beginning of this article, we spoke about the coachee who had just received a 360 report.
“360 instruments date back to the 1950s and they are designed to provide feedback from a range of different groups, the boss, the peers, direct reportees and various other groups as needed or seen appropriate. They are now widely used in organisations, and there is a high chance that any employee progressing in a corporation has received at least one 360 review.
Now, digging into this, there is a wide range of practice in organisations around how they are best used.
Used at their best, they are a powerful and impactful tool, but at their worst, it can be quite insidious leaving employees vulnerable in an unhealthy way – a cop out for poor leaders and HR professionals. There are different approaches to models used, questions, styles and along with statistical modeling providing “indications” around how good a leader you are (though bias exists) and based on various research practices, some more robust than others.”
(Eurich, T. (2017))
360s definitely have their place especially if they are robust and administered safely and properly. Given how time consuming they can be (if you add up everyone’s time), one would not want to run them too often.
This all said, it would still be important to embrace what we have been talking about in previous sections. It is an opportunity to learn about our raters, reflect and be curious about where gaps emerge, and use it to start important and relevant conversations.
It’s about the collective, not only you, the leader.
It’s about the givers and receivers – together!
It’s about learning together and owning our own learning within our varying working relationships – whether we are the giver or the receiver.
It’s about starting important and relevant conversations, and the relationships that are necessary to safely have these conversations.
So hopefully now you are more aware of the importance of feedback for everyone involved in the process and in my upcoming post I look forward to sharing my personal take on 360 feedback and some work I’ve been doing to help leaders improve the relevance of this important leadership tool.
References:
Buckingham, M. & Goodall, A. (2019), “The Feedback Fallacy”, Harvard Business Reivew, March-April 2019
Stone, D. and Heen, S. (2014), “Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well”, Penguin, London.
Eurich, T. (2017), “Insight: The Power of Self-Awareness in a Self-Deluded World”, MacMillan, London.
Dr Robyn Wilson focuses on helping leaders tackle the change and challenges they face and journeys with them as they, their teams and organizations navigate these with the aim of becoming stronger, gaining more clarity and with strengthened relationships and personal capability. She is the founder of Praxis Management Consulting.
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